On Individuality

        I remember the cartoon of a vast field, a single man standing in its center.  The caption read, ‘A man outstanding in his field.’  As I observe society, I find fewer and fewer people who are truly outstanding.  Instead, I hear the plea for acceptance, ‘just the way I am.’  ‘Even if my choices are hurting you,’ I hear them say, behind this supposed expressed need, ‘let me continue as I am.’  The assumption is that love accepts completely, without any need for change.  My understanding of love is different.  I have learned that love wants what is best for the person who is the object of that love.  Love looks ahead to what a person can become, to what they can grow into.  This is my understanding of unconditional love.  In contrast, conditional love requires the person to change before love can be granted.  Conditional love implies that love can be lost, if the proper behavior is not performed.  I love my children dearly, and for this reason, I will chastise them, so that they will know that certain behaviors are not acceptable, while others are a blessing to those around them.  Always, my love for them remains, even when they disobey.

So what is this plea for unconditional acceptance?  Acceptance, not love, I must emphasize!  Somewhere along the way, the real definition of love has been lost!   In this plea I hear a complete and utter misunderstanding of the idea of individuality.  Maybe this is because there has been a complete and utter misunderstanding of the Maker of Individuality.  God is an individual.  There is no one like Him.  The Bible teaches us that you could search for ever, and not EVER find another like Him.  No one even comes close.  And He made us in His Image.  This is one of the ways that His Image is seen here on earth – in our individuality.  Each one of us was created separately, distinctly, using a new mold, so to speak.  “When God made you, He broke the mold.”  I’ve heard that phrase used to praise someone for some grand opus or great achievement.  But it is true of us all.  He never used the same mold twice, even for twins, who are SO similar, but not exactly the same.  It was His desire that we all be unique and distinct, reflecting Him. 

But He has a greater desire for us than just being separate individuals.  His desire, if I may be so bold to speak of it, is that we grow in the shadow of the Almighty.  That, being close to Him, we become more like Him.  Simply put, the reason for this, far from ego, is because there is nothing better than Him.  He loves us – wants the best for us.  He knows that we have a need to change, since we are not perfect, and his desire for change in us is to eventually see His own face in our countenance, like the smithy who knows his work is done when he sees his reflection in the molten metal. 

Having said this, I assert that anything that denies or distorts or destroys individuality is not biblical, not in line with the will of God.  God given individuality is our unique, distinct existence.  When two unique, distinct individuals marry, (voluntary union, by the biblical standard) they unite two distinct individualities, becoming One.  And what God has brought together, let no man separate.  Now, there is a unique, distinct family.  I see individuality as remaining here – 1.  each individual is responsible to the Lord for him/herself (understanding that they are also responsible for the union as well), 2.  In examining how the seed of local self-government is planted, it must first exist in the individuals, before it exists in the family.  Another point is that the Trinity is One, but Three distinct Individuals.  Without one part, they would not exist, because they are Three.  Put another way, without one part, they would not exist, because One cannot be divided and still be whole.  But each individual in the Trinity is unique, distinct, separate from the others, though united eternally to them, inseparable, like three faces on one head.

On the surface, the pleas for acceptance, the pleas for tolerance, for unity all sound good.  But delving deeper into the meaning behind them will show, often, that the definitions of the terms have been distorted, strangled until they no longer represent the original word.  Unity, for example:  unity is a common ground, a likemindedness of two or more individuals, a linking from within.  From a biblical perspective, this likeminded state is encouraged, strongly, by voluntary consent.  “Get along with everyone, so far as it depends on you.”  This is so different from the common statement, “Can’t we all just get along?”  Association is so much more than getting along.  A person chooses, voluntarily, to associate with this person or that person.  Should I make an alliance with someone who is a pathological liar?  Or a rapist?  I ask this to show the absurdity of the previous question, ‘can’t we all just get along?’  Some people are to be avoided.  This is not to say we are to treat them badly, as the Scripture stated, ‘…so far as it depends on you.’  “Love your enemies,” however, does not mean to marry one of them.

The idea of ‘leveling the playing field’ so that we are all the same is a denial of the individuality that God created in us.  This is socialism.  All men are created equal, and have equal value in God’s sight.  But if a man will not work, let him not eat.  Let each man be rewarded for his labors.  Each of us was made to bring glory to God in our own unique way.  Some of us are good at certain things, while others are not.  When we excel, whether in our strengths or weaknesses, we bring glory to an excellent God. 

It is the misunderstanding of individuality that is leading our nation toward collectivism.  Our nation was founded upon the biblical idea of individuality and voluntary unity.  Voluntary unity is a coming together of unique and distinct individuals, who each have a part to play in the union.  Without the individuals, there would be no union.  In a marriage, in which the Scripture says the two shall become one, the individuality of each partner is maintained.  The oneness that is spoken of is a voluntary union that reflects the individuality of each part.  Without one of the parts, there is no union.  And in God’s benevolence, the two parts are meant to complement each other, to His glory and to the benefit of the individuals.

So shall I ask you to accept me as I am?  God forbid!  Love me enough to spur me on toward love and good deeds, to grow and change and become more like Him.  As iron sharpens iron, rub away the roughness of my imperfections, as a tool in God’s hands, and let me return the favor.